"Oh, the weight of it all"

Have you ever had something or someone in your life that you know shouldn't be there?
Now don't get me wrong, I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and people come in and out of your life for a purpose, but did you ever know that someone came into your life for a reason and then you completely screwed that up?

I have felt so guilty lately because I know that God brought this person into my life and my life and actions have been the worst witness to him. I just keep thinking that I have gotten myself in way to deep and there is no way that I can fix this.

Then today it hit me. I am giving myself way too much credit. Who am I to think that I was so great and powerful to ruin God's plan? Thankfully God will work in spite of me. Then I started thinking ever deeper (shocker..i know) and I realized that maybe God brought this particular person into my life to teach me a lesson. To draw me closer to Himself. Maybe it was even to humble me, to show me that I am no where near perfect. I don't know what his ultimate goal with this situation is and I am thankful for that. I am so thankful to have a God that knows more than I do, can comprehend more than I can and that has plans far greater than anything I can understand, imagine or grasp.

It is so relieving to give up control, to have the weight of your world lifted off of your shoulders.